One of my favorite websites- http://ultimateclassicrock.com– just compiled a list of the worst lyrics in Classic Rock, and it’s hard to argue it.

Here are the Top 10:

1. “Why Can’t This Be Love?”, Van Halen: “Only time will tell if we stand the test of time.”

2. “Don’t Stop Believin'”, Journey: “Just a city boy, born and raised in South Detroit.” (South Detroit doesn’t exist.)

3. “Roundabout”, Yes: “Mountains come out of the sky, and they stand there.”

4. “Sleeping Bag”, ZZ Top: “Let’s go out to Egypt ’cause it’s in the plan . . . we’ll whip out our mattress ’cause there ain’t no beds.”

5. “Dirty White Boy”, Foreigner: “I’m a loner, but I’m never alone.”

6. “A Horse with No Name”, America: “In the desert you can remember your name, ’cause there ain’t no one for to give you no pain.”

7. “De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da”, The Police: “And when their eloquence escapes me, their logic ties me up and rapes me.”

8. “We Didn’t Start the Fire”, Billy Joel: “Rock and Roller, cola wars, I can’t take it anymore.” (A Coke and Pepsi rivalry frustrates him?)

9. “We Built This City”, Starship: “Who counts the money, underneath the bar, who rides the wrecking ball into our guitars?”

10. “Pinball Wizard”, The Who: “[He] plays by sense of smell.”

 

Yeah, they’re all pretty bad. But what about “Christine Sixteen” by KISS?

“I don’t usually say things like this to girls your age
But when I saw you coming out of school that day
(Christine sixteen)
That day I knew, I knew
I’ve got to have you, I’ve got to have you

[Bridge]
She’s been around, but she’s young and clean
I’ve got to have her, can’t live without her, whoa no”

OMFG.

Or what about Winger’s “Seventeen”?

“She said, “I’m only seventeen (Seventeen)
I’ll show you love like you’ve never seen”, oh
She’s only seventeen (Seventeen)
Daddy says she’s too young
But she’s old enough for me

Or… the creepiest song on the planet, “Into the Night” by Benny Mardones?

What the actual hell?

Does that qualify as Classic Rock?

Probably not. But I wanted to mention anyway, since it always gave me the creeps, and I’m still shocked it gets played on radio stations to this day.

Check out the full list here: https://ultimateclassicrock.com/worst-rock-lyrics/

 

Got any to add?

 

 


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