What’s So Great About Summer, Anyway?
I always see people talking about how much they looove Summer, and OMG how great the lake/beach is and how they pretty much live for the season.
The hell?
Ok, granted, when I was a kid, Summer was awesome because there was no school. But even then, the heat and the long days drove me kind of batty. It’s much worse now as an adult.
I like making lists, so here’s my top reasons why Summer pretty much sucks:
- The heat, obviously. And it keeps getting worse. Yayyyy global warming!
- I sweat a TON- I got that gene from my father- so any physical exertation during the Summer makes me look like I just got out of the shower, but stinkier.
- Bugs. OMG. FREAKING BUGS!
- My animals hate Summer. Anyone who has horses or a Husky knows this pain.
- Longgggg days… yeah, some extra sunlight is great, but after 7pm, it’s pretty unnecessary.
- SUNBURN! Anyone who is fair skinned like I am knows the pain of fried skin after 10 minutes of sun exposure. Yes, I still wear my sunscreen. No, it’s not always effective. I still get lovely, blotchy skin, and probably future skin cancer. My son has my fair skin, so he’s going to really enjoy that sucky Summer bonus as well.
- It’s not hunting season or football season, which makes my husband complain constantly…as he pretty much lives for hunting and college football.
- BUGS, ya’ll. Freaking BUGS.
- Also, the grass grows too damn fast. And half of my neighborhood doesn’t know what a lawnmower is for it seems. I’m now wondering what an HOA is for if noone has to mow their yards…
- Clearly Summer turns me into a Karen.
- My Husky sheds even MORE, which I am shocked that he’s not bald at this point.
- Dehydration. I seem to get there faster as I get older. And then I drink a ton of water and then have to pee every five minutes. It’s a vicious cycle.
- Less clothing isn’t as fun as you hit Middle Age and you have spider veins, cellulite, and wierd bumps that weren’t there a few Summers ago…
- Swimsuits seem to have no middle-ground. You either are super slutty or you can look like a grandma. There is no in between. It’s like swimsuit makers forgot there is an entire segment of society that wants to look cute, but not have all the booty hanging out… but not look like Grandma Moses.
- TV is extra lame.
- All of my favorite beverages- coffee, merlot and Rumchata with fireball- don’t go with Summer AT ALL.
- Did I mention bugs?
Ok, now that that’s off of my chest, what are your least favorite things about Summer? Surely I’m not the only one who wishes we could just skip it?
Bring it on Fall… bring it ON!!!!!! August is too damn long.